Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
