Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize