fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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