you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
she told me i tasted like america
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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