batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
