This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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