Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
