Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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