Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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