just tell him i said nine months
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Randomize