i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
