Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
