As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
