Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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