it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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