I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
