Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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