How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
