I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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