508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize