I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
