You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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