last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
