4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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