dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
