I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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