Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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