I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
