you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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