one two three fourrrrnication!
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
4 words: hood of his car
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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