It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
