I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize