Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
