idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
