My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
