I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
