thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
