Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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