You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Randomize
