He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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