Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
i out mim tonsoeep
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
