he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
