Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize