Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
