We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
