I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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