I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
