dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
