despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
