So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
