i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Randomize
